Know Your Stars! Shel and Lai Style!
by Shel Death By Spork
Summary: I know theres alot of KYS fics out there but it's MY version! You know it has to be screwed up! And it is! Rated for Inu's mouth and my and Lai's pervertedness...yeah! Heh heh...
1. Miroku! Scarred For Life!

**Lai: **((playing with a paddle ball)) Don't own 'em.

**Shel: **((watching ball bounce up and down mesmerized)) Yeah…don't own 'em…

* * *

"WELCOME!" Shel slides out and slides off screen into a car. The alarm goes off and a cat hisses. Lai comes in calmly and rolls her eyes. "You moron…"

Shel comes back on screen and straightens her shirt and tie…YES A TIE! A BILLIE JOE TIE! "Yea yeah…anyway! LIGHTS PLEASE!"

The lights come on and there's a huge row of bleachers filled with all of the InuYasha characters…who don't look too happy. Shel grabs her trusty shovel. ((you know the one if you've read Resurrection and Ghost of You! Tell me how much you LOVE that shovel!))

"If any of you have a problem you can report…to meh!"

Suddenly all of the characters look extremely happy…except the dark ones…and InuYasha of course.

Lai blows a fog horn thing. "FIRST UP!" The lights go out and muffled screaming is heard. Someone yells at someone for stepping on they're hair. And of course Lai apologizes to Sesshomaru. More muffled screaming and the lights come on.

Shel and Lai are standing beside a stool in a spotlight with Miroku sitting on it…looking totally confused and stumped. Lai huggles him…of course. "WELCOME HOUSHI-SAMA!"

Miroku enjoys this of course. "Why thank you ladies!"

Shel pulls her poor obsessed cousin off of the monk. "Remember the thing?" She pulls on a chain that comes out of nowhere. A voice from no where echoes…

"_**Know your stars…know your stars…know your stars…know your stars…"**_

Miroku looks around for the person. "Who said that?"

_**None of your concern young victim I MEAN monk…"**_

"Okaaaaay then…" Shel and Lai smile at Miroku then sidestep into the shadows. "Have fun." Lai glares. "And I paid 20 bucks for the voice so you better do a good job!"

_**Miroku…**_

"Yes?" Miroku was getting nervous…

_**He still plays with dolls…**_

"WHAT! Still? I never did!"

_**Then why is there a Barbie in your pocket?**_

"Umm…I dunno…" Shift nervous eyes…sweatdrop.

_**Miroku…He has a pet chicken…**_

"HAD a pet chicken." InuYasha comments from the bleachers. Miroku looked upset. "You ATE Bob!"

"…yes…"

Miroku gasped. "HOW COULD YOU!"

_**AHEM! Back to me! Miroku…He's in love with Kagura.**_

"Well…she is the only girl with her earrings…"

_**Besides you?**_

"Well yes…I mean No! I mean I'm not a girl!"

_**But you're gay right?**_

"NO!"

_**Then why is your right ear pierced and not your left?**_

Miroku tugged on his left ear. "GACK! MY earring's gone!"

Naraku laughed evilly. "He will never know…" Putting the gold earring in his pocket he turns into a shadow and disappears.

_**Okay then…MIROKU…**_

"SHUT UP!"

_**Are you crying?**_

-Sniff- "No…"

Shel comes back on and glares at the voice. "Okay you made him cry…you're job is done…NEXT VICTIM!"

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Thatwas fun! Fun--this fanfic is for fun and fun ONLY...I get bored after my ig updates and me and Lai like to do stuff like this. So dont expect TONS of updates. Later! 


	2. TORTURE THE PUPPY!

STILL DON'T OWN 'EM…heheh…not yet…

* * *

Shel waits patiently by the stool in the spotlight. "Lai…please fetch our next victim." Lai grins evilly. "Fetch? You got it!"

Lights go off…censored words are heard and the lights go back on with InuYasha sitting dumbfounded on the stool…dumbfounded…whats new?

"Damn you…" He mutters. Shel takes the shovel from behind her back. "Yes yes we know. Anyway, making Miroku cry was fun!"

Miroku is in the bleachers mentally scarred and still teary eyed. "How mean…"

Lai looks unhappy. "Poor Miroku." Shel rolls her eyes. "ANYWAY! This will be fun too!" She throws her shovel off screen into the bleachers. Someone screams ow. "Sorry Fluffy-kun! Anyway," she snaps her fingers. "Voice! Do your stuff!" And exits off screen dragging Lai with her.

_**Muwahaha…**_

"QUIT LAUGHING!" InuYasha snaps.

_**Sorry…AHEM! InuYasha…**_

"Oh boy…"

_**He's a girl in disguise…**_

"Wha..?"

Shel spits her French vanilla coffee ((FROM STRABUCKS!))out of her mouth in a dramatic manner and gets it all over Lai's face. "NOW HOLD UP!"

"If I were girl…" InuYasha glared. "Could I do this?" He gives his sexy smirk at the camera.

"KAWAII!" Shel and Lai attach to each of his arms. "OURS!" Inu sweatdrops. "Get off me!"

"He's ours…" Shel glares at everyone. "Not really but I like to think that way."

InuYasha shoved each of the girls away from him. "No way! I belong to no one!"

Kagome stands up with Shel's shovel. "Come again?"

The camera goes back to the spotlight to find InuYasha hiding behind Shel who is hiding behind Lai. "E-except her…"

Kagome smiles and sits back down. "That's what I thought."

"Maybe I shouldn't have given her that shovel…" Shel thinks((WOW! THIKNING!)) out loud.

_**AHEM! I believe I have a victim! **_

Shel and Lai push Inu back on the stool. "Yeah go ahead."

_**Thank you… InuYasha…he's cheating on Kagome with Kagura.**_

"I thought he was cheating on her with Sango." Shel said reading the script she had given the voice dude. A loud thud is heard in the bleachers. "Miroku fainted!" Shippo yells.

"I…" InuYasha had gone all shifty eyes. "Experimented."

"THAT IS A SECRET!" Sango yelled. Then smiled cheesily running away from a very pissed off Kagome and Kikyou.

"Experimented." Lai was giggling her butt off and Kikyou threw the shovel at her and she fell to the ground. "Shut up Lai!"

_**InuYasha…he's really 68**_

"Actually…" InuYasha used his fingers to count. "Including the 50 years…I am." He blinked twice.

Lai sat up with a black eye and a tooth missing. "You're 18?" Shel gave her the Are-You-Really-That-Dumb-And-Can-I-Have-Your-Cookies look. "Duuuh…can I have your cookies?"

"They're not cookies." Lai pulled out a bag of Skittles. "They're skittles as big as cookies.

Shel got all bug eyed. "SKITTLES!" Lai through them to InuYasha. Who surprisingly accepted. Shel sobbed. "MY SKITTLES! Yo Hommi G.! You stole my fizzle!"

Lai blinked. InuYasha blinked. "Fizzle…?"

Lai rolled her eyes. "SECURITY!"

In minutes the censor was on again and InuYasha AND Shel were hauled off by big guys in blue cop suits out the back doors. "Phew." Lai sighed as soon as the doors were shut. They opened again and Kikyou and Kagome came back in dusting themselves off. Sango followed with a black eye, bloody lip, and teeth missing. "IT WAS A JOKE!"

Lai pulled Sango over to the stool and grinned. "Lights please!"

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End file.
